HOW TO HANDLE PRESENTATION SURPRISES

by Kathy Reiffenstein

During a recent speech by President Obama at Fortune's Most Powerful Women Summit the presidential seal fell off the podium. Most likely this is something that the president's staff and the event organizers would like to forget. But the episode is worth highlighting because it so clearly illustrates one of the things so many presenters fear...disruptive presentation surprises.

And although most of us won't have to worry about misbehaving presidential seals, we will have to worry about power failures, slide projector malfunctions, microphone feedback, tripping on wires and more.

Shock, impatience, blaming others, being thrown off course are all normal human reactions when something goes wrong.

But as a presenter, you don't have the luxury of showing any of those reactions.

Your audience may feel similarly or they may not know what to feel. In either case, they are looking to you to guide them through the situation. If you overreact and seem upset or flustered, your audience will pick that up and assume the "surprise" is a big deal.

Given that your primary objective in the presentation is to ensure a quality experience for your audience, how do your turn those "surprises" into just an inconvenient, perhaps even humorous, blip?

Certainly your first concern is to put the audience at ease. Take a look at how President Obama handled the situation I referenced at the beginning.

He took a moment to gather his own thoughts as he said, "oh goodness" and then, through humor, put everyone at ease by saying, "That's all right. All of you know who I am." The audience laughed and everything was fine. Contrast this with a different scenario: what if he had appeared upset and called for someone to come and re-affix the seal or pick it up? The flow of his speech would have been quite disrupted and the audience would have been aware of the president's annoyance which, in turn, would have made them uncomfortable.

Humor is an excellent way to diffuse any unexpected snafus, as long as you're comfortable saying something amusing. But what if you're not? Here are some other suggestions:

1. Use a factual statement to allay any concerns the audience might be feeling. For example, "Just hang in there for a minute and we'll be back on track."

2. Make lemonade out of lemons. "We've been given an unexpected opportunity for some dialogue. Turn to the person next to you and answer this question." [something relevant to your presentation]

3. If the disruption looks like it will last more than 5 or so minutes or if it will require help from other people [like the A/V crew], consider giving the audience an unplanned break. You could combine this with the point above and ask them to discuss something relevant to your presentation while on break.

Bottom line take-away: don't make a big deal of any disruptive surprises and focus on making your audience comfortable that you're not flustered and confident that you will still deliver value.

What other techniques have you used or seen used when there are unexpected presentation surprises?

WOMEN AS LEADERS, PART III

by Kathy Reiffenstein

In the last two posts, we explored women's relative lack of success in reaching senior leadership positions despite their very applicable and desirable skills. To address this situation, McKinsey & Company, the global management consulting firm, embarked on an initiative to determine what drives and sustains successful female leaders. Out of their research with 85 women around the world, plus an examination of academic research and interviews with experts in psychology, leadership and organizational behavior, they developed a model that can help women become more confident and effective leaders.

The centered leadership model draws on the theories of positive psychology and has five aspects:

1. meaning
   
2. managing energy
   
3. positive framing
   
4. connecting
5. engaging

Let's look at each of these dimensions in detail.

MEANING

Meaning is the "motivation that moves us", it inspires us, it gets us up in the morning, it gives value to the work we do. According to McKinsey, "studies have shown that among professionals, meaning translates into greater job satisfaction, higher productivity, lower turnover and increased loyalty."

For some, it may be screamingly obvious what is meaningful to them [and what is not]. Others may require more introspection to examine and determine what they're good at and what they enjoy doing. The key is to be clear about what does have meaning for you and how that fits into your overall goals and objectives.

MANAGING ENERGY

It's no secret that women work hard and often long hours on the job. And then go home to more work. The study authors say "...work-life balance is a myth so the only hope women have is to balance their energy flows. This means basing your priorities on the activities that energize you, both at work and at home, and actively managing your resources to avoid dipping into reserves."

The concept of flow, developed by one of the founders of positive psychology, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, is "...a sense of being so engaged by activities that you don't notice the passage of time." We can all relate to times when we've been so engrossed in and energized by something that we are shocked to see how much time has passed while we were doing that activity. People who experience this feeling are generally more productive and get more satisfaction from what they're doing.

According to the McKinsey research, "One useful tactic is to identify the conditions and situations that replenish your energy and those that sap it. Self-awareness lets you deliberately incorporate restorative elements into your day. It can also help you to space out your energy-sapping tasks throughout the day, instead of bundling them all into a single morning or afternoon. A particularly useful tip, we have found, is to give yourself time during the day to focus without distractions such as blinking lights and buzzing phones. Your productivity will benefit several times over."

POSITIVE FRAMING

We all see the world and process experiences through filters or frames and we can exercise a good deal of control over how we interpret those pictures. According to McKinsey, "Many studies suggest that optimists see life more realistically than pessimists do, a frame of mind that can be crucial to making the right business decisions." Optimists are confident that they can manage whatever challenges arise.

"No matter how pessimistic you are by nature, you can learn to view situations as optimists do. The key is self-awareness. If a meeting goes badly, for example, you should limit your thoughts about it to its temporary and specific impact and keep them impersonal. It helps to talk with trusted colleagues about the reasons for the poor meeting and ways to do better next time. These discussions should take place quickly enough for you to make a specific plan and act on it. You should also undertake some activity that will restore both your energy and your faith in yourself—perhaps having a hard workout, going out with friends, or spending time with your children."

CONNECTING

In an article in Harvard Business Review, Mark Hunter and Herminia Ibarra say that what differentiates a leader from a manager “...is the ability to figure out where to go and to enlist the people and groups necessary to get there." We've talked here and here on this blog about the importance of building the right networks to further your goals.

The McKinsey research found that "A number of studies have shown that women who promote their own interests vigorously are seen as aggressive, uncooperative, and selfish. An equal number of studies show that the failure of women to promote their own interests results in a lack of female leaders. Until one of these conditions changes, sponsors -- senior colleagues willing to offer help and create opportunities for their protegees -- are the key to helping women gain access to opportunities they merit and need to develop."

ENGAGING

Engaging is recognizing that you need to talk about your accomplishments instead of believing that the work will speak for itself. It's also about risk taking and having the courage and confidence to assess the risks inherent in any opportunity and then take them. "Reaching out to others -- not to avoid making decisions yourself but to learn the best outcome from change -- can often help you see opportunities in the right frame and decide whether to go for them."

According to psychologist Daniel Gilbert, "...people who make a choice for risk and work with it, rather than avoid it, report a greater degree of happiness than others do."

SO WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?

Perhaps the skills in the centered leadership model resonate with you because you're already doing these things. Perhaps you see skills here that you need to acquire or practice. In either case, the McKinsey study has given us a framework for examining our own circumstances and determining how this model can help us, as women, become more effective senior leaders.

WOMEN AS LEADERS, PART II

by Kathy Reiffenstein

Confidence -- specifically the lack of it -- is an issue that everyone deals with from time to time. But in the workplace, lack of confidence seems to be a uniquely female struggle that can and does get in the way of being seen as having leadership capabilities.

There are undoubtedly a variety of influences that come together to fuel this lack of confidence:

• societal mores, customs and traditions

• parental upbringing where girls are raised to be "nicer", more nurturing and less aggressive than boys

• workplace standards which traditionally have elevated men, rather than women, to leadership positions

Yet as I pointed out in the last post, research studies have shown that some of our uniquely feminine characteristics -- like strong interpersonal skills, ability to collaborate and concern for employees -- position us well to take on leadership roles. Even so, since we're not seeing actions that validate that point of view in the workplace, we can lose confidence in the belief that we do have what it takes to be a senior leader.

Low confidence makes us feel anxious and even afraid...that our opinions won't be valued, that we don't know what we're talking about, that we're really not competent. We then act passively and perhaps avoid new challenges, in a desire to stay under the radar. A variety of possible problems may result:

POSSIBLE PROBLEM: We tend to gravitate to jobs in Human Resources, Public Relations and Communications, areas which are a good fit for our expressive, collaborative skills but are removed from the typical corporate seats of power -- jobs with bottom line accountability, strategic responsibilities and the need for financial acumen.
SUGGESTED SOLUTION: Brush up on your financial knowledge so you can participate during financial discussions and be able to clearly articulate how the work you do contributes to the company financials. Be open to and even actively pursue jobs or projects which will allow you to acquire key financial and strategic skills.

POSSIBLE PROBLEM: We wait to speak up in a meeting or with our boss until we have all the facts so we can be sure we sound knowledgeable and don't make a mistake.
SUGGESTED SOLUTION: Trust your ability to have an intelligent discussion, even without all the facts, based on your existing understanding of a topic or situation. Always be flexible to incorporate new information as it emerges.

POSSIBLE PROBLEM: In a group situation or meeting, we don't share our opinions or perspectives for fear of being "wrong", offending those with different points of view or because we feel intimidated by others who have more knowledge, more power or more authority.
SUGGESTED SOLUTION: Do your homework about the topic being discussed and come to a meeting prepared to confidently share your opinion, backed by your research. Certainly be sensitive to those who see things differently and use your professionalism and tact to avoid any confrontations.

POSSIBLE PROBLEM: You don't share your accomplishments because it feels like bragging.
SUGGESTED SOLUTION: Recognize that you owe it to others, particularly those in positions of authority, to let them know what you're good at. Craft your story with lots of details and examples and focus on the results achieved rather than how great you are.

It's easy to grasp intellectually what you should do in these types of situations to demonstrate more confidence; it's another thing entirely to actually do it! The best advice is to be intentional and consistent about changing your behaviour. Try these techniques:

• Step out of your comfort zone. Building on your strengths, volunteer for a project you've never done or an assignment that seems challenging. Set small goals, working on only one area you want to change at a time and you will see the positive results accumulate quickly.

• Keep doing. The more you do, the easier it gets. For example, after speaking up a few times at a meeting and getting positive reactions from colleagues and bosses, you'll wonder why you were ever apprehensive to do it.

• Allow yourself to make mistakes and don't dwell on past mistakes. Don't expect to be perfect at the new behaviours right away. Learn from what didn't go as planned and incorporate that learning for the next time.

• Smile, stand tall and look people in the eye. People tend to treat you based on how you act. If you show up as confident and assured, that's how others will see you.

In the last post in the Women as Leaders series, we'll look at a leadership model developed by McKinsey & Company which is designed to help women become more self-confident and effective business leaders.

WOMEN AS LEADERS, PART I

by Kathy Reiffenstein

For years, women in business have tried to be more like men. Men have traditionally held the power positions and it only made sense that the way to achieve that same standing was to imitate the leadership traits of our male counterparts.

In this endeavour, women have tried to overcome or mask many of their innate characteristics like being collaborative, sensitive to others and relationship-focused in favour of a more aggressive, less caring, bottom line oriented approach to leadership.

POSITIVES RATHER THAN NEGATIVES

But a number of recent research studies suggest that these very “female” traits we’ve tried to hide are actually positives rather than negatives for today’s leaders.

The studies show that women executives, when rated by their peers, subordinates and bosses, score higher than their male counterparts on a wide variety of measures--from producing high-quality work to goal-setting to mentoring employees.

Another study, conducted by Princeton, New Jersey-based management consulting firm, Caliper, and Aurora, a London-based brand marketing organization, determined that,

“Women leaders are more assertive and persuasive, have a stronger need to get things done and are more willing to take risks than male leaders. They are more empathetic and flexible, as well as stronger in interpersonal skills than their male counterparts.”

So what does this mean for women as they climb the corporate ladder and navigate the male-dominated ranks of senior management?

The key take-away is that we women are particularly well-suited to leverage our relational and interpersonal skills to excel in our area of competency while, at the same time, building and enhancing our network of colleagues and influencers.

According to Douglas Elix, former head of IBM's Global Services Division, women are more thoughtful than men in considering the various aspects of a decision, more collaborative and more willing to share the glory. Women are motivated less by self-interest and more by ''what they can do for the company,'' Elix says. Harvard Business School Professor Rosabeth Moss Kanter, author of the 20-year-old management classic, Men and Women of the Corporation, also sees women as having key strengths:

''Women get high ratings on exactly those skills needed to succeed in the global Information Age, where teamwork and partnering are so important.''

So with all these extremely relevant leadership skills, why aren’t more women rising to senior management ranks? Why are the steps of the corporate ladder so steep and why does there still appear to be a glass ceiling once we near the top?

Could it be that, in spite of having the ability, we lack the confidence to leverage those feminine skills to their fullest extent?

In the next post, we’ll look at the confidence issue and explore specific ways we can employ the strengths we have as women.

PRESENTATION TIP: PAUSE FOR EFFECT

by Kathy Reiffenstein

A well-timed pause in a presentation is the mark of an experienced presenter but, with a little practice, it is a simple technique for anyone to incorporate. It works equally well in a formal presentation, introductory remarks as the chair of a meeting or a senior management update in the boardroom.

The pause offers a number of benefits:

• It builds anticipation ~~ "The empires of the future are the empires of the mind." The pause is particularly effective in building anticipation when it is combined with a promise of significance ~~ "The next statistic is overwhelming."

• It exhibits confidence ~~ typically anxiety causes us to speak non-stop, avoiding silence at all costs. So when we are well-prepared enough to pause purposefully, we show the audience that we are confident in both our message and delivery.

• It allows a statement or phrase to stand out ~~ "Victory at all costs, victory in spite of all terror, victory however long and hard the road may be; for without victory there is no survival."

• It allows us to evaluate the impact of our words on the audience ~~ the pause should be accompanied by direct and steady eye contact with the audience, allowing for an assessment of their reaction.

• It provides a transition from one segment or thought to another.

• It allows the audience time to absorb what you've said ~~ since it's hard for anyone to listen and think at the same time, the audience requires numerous 'breaks' to process what they've just heard.

Now with all these accolades for the pause, you may think that it needs to be minutes in length to accomplish so much. Not so. A pause of 3-5 seconds is all you need in most cases. As you become adept at incorporating the pause into your presentations, you will intuitively judge the right length.

Three final suggestions for becoming comfortable with using the pause:

• Practice what it sounds like by reading out loud from the newspaper, choosing where to pause to highlight or emphasize certain aspects of the story.

• During rehearsal, use a timer to get a sense of how long your pauses are, which will help you internalize the right timing.

• Mark your speech notes where you want to pause rather than relying on your memory or sense of timing during the actual presentation.

So the next time you are speaking or presenting...pause...and watch the effect.

USING FACEBOOK FOR BUSINESS

by Kathy Reiffenstein

I have a love/hate affair with Facebook. I never know what to post because I never know who I'm really talking to. I originally signed up to use it as a fun way to stay in touch with friends and family I didn't see very often. And then some of my business colleagues started friending me and suddenly my business and personal contacts were intertwined.

While it's OK to share a few personal details with business associates, I'm fairly certain that my business colleagues and clients don't care that I just found a terrific new orchid that I'm dying to have, but my gardening friends sure do. And I don't know that I want my business associates to know I'm an avid Farmville player. Similarly, my friends and family don't particularly want to know about the latest article in my industry magazine on presentation skills.

I started to feel like I had a split personality. What's a businesswoman, concerned about managing her branding and professional visibility, to do??

After talking to colleagues, doing some research and observing how other small businesses are handling Facebook, here are some "best practices" I've come up with to help me most effectively use Facebook as a business tool (and not split myself in two!).

• Get a Facebook Business Page. This is a separate page that can be set up in the name of your business where you can invite business colleagues to "like" the page [works much like becoming a friend]. You can then dedicate your posts to information and comments that are relevant to your business, whether it's an update about what you're working on, an article or event of interest or some information about the products or services you offer.

• If both business colleagues and personal friends do have access to your regular Facebook profile, then discretion in what you post is critical. Be careful with personal pictures, inappropriate language and controversial or political opinions. Get familiar with the privacy settings that Facebook allows and use them as necessary.

• Make sure your avatar [the picture you upload that accompanies every post you make] looks professional. Wear business attire that is consistent with your personal branding.

• Get a personal URL so colleagues and clients can find you.

• Post links on your profile to your business website and any blogs or newsletters you publish.

• Before you post something to your wall, ask yourself: "Is this going to provide value to my business colleagues and clients?" Look for informative articles, links and videos to post instead of constantly promoting your own products and services.

• Add your Facebook URL to your e-mail signature line.

Bottom line...Facebook is a social media tool, so by all means, be social and use it to connect with current and potential business colleagues and clients. But do so professionally, with style and concern for your personal brand.

THE SKILL OF NETWORKING

by Kathy Reiffenstein

Networking is about far more than collecting business cards. Rather, it is a business strategy which can position you as a savvy, connected professional and open doors you didn't even know were there.

And, as with any strategy, flawless implementation is the key to success.

The benefits of strategic networking are many:

• uncovering the "hidden" job market -- positions that may not be advertised but are available when the right person comes along

• developing a group of contacts who can be resources to you for a variety of needs and in turn, positioning yourself as the "go-to" person for others' needs

• meeting interesting people

• discovering new business opportunities

• advancing your career

• developing mutually beneficial relationships

NETWORKING BEST PRACTICES

As with any activity, the more effectively you do it, the more likely it is to produce the desired results. Since networking certainly requires an investment of time [as if you didn't already have an over-crowded schedule!], it makes sense to fine tune your skills in this area.

• Establish your networking goals. What is it you want and need to accomplish by developing or expanding a professional network? In the list above, some items will be more relevant to you than others. Perhaps you want to uncover an exciting and fulfilling volunteer opportunity that will utilise your skills; perhaps you want to find a mentor who can provide support as you climb the corporate ladder; perhaps you are looking for a strategic partner for your new business idea; perhaps you're looking for contacts in an organisation you'd like to work for or do business with. Spend some time to determine what's important to you.

• Being clear about your networking goals will help you choose the appropriate types of networking events, activities and groups to invest your time in. If, for example, you are looking for a mentor, you wouldn't choose an event where most of the attendees are less experienced than you.

• Develop and polish your "elevator speech" -- the answer to the question, "What do you do?" You want it to be crisp, articulate and encourage the questioner to say, "Tell me more." [We'll cover elevator speeches in more detail in a subsequent post].
  

• Smile, make eye contact and generally behave like someone who would be fun and interesting to get to know. Even if you're naturally shy with people you don't know, being clear on what you want to accomplish and what you're going to say about yourself will go a long way to making you more comfortable.

• Be able to clearly explain what you're looking for when someone asks you, "How can I help you?" Most people you meet will be happy to introduce you to one of their contacts or suggest a resource which may be of use to you. But if they don't understand what you want, it will be more difficult for them to be helpful. So plan ahead and be ready to communicate your needs when asked.

• And most importantly -- look for what you can offer others you interact with. One of the major keys to networking success is being generous and looking for opportunities to help others, whether it's with information, an introduction or just an empathetic ear.

Luckily we women are good at building relationships, which is the foundation of good networking. Improving your skills in this area can help ensure that you take advantage of every opportunity that presents itself.

In our busy, connected world of today, it's not so much what you know, but who you know...and maybe even more importantly, who knows you.

COMMUNICATION STYLES - PART III

by Kathy Reiffenstein

In the last two posts, we’ve looked at the four communication styles, based on Carl Jung’s work: Intuitor, Thinker, Senser and Feeler.

And while it’s interesting to learn about how different people look at the world and communicate their ideas, we have to ask ourselves…so what? How can we take this information and apply it to our communications to improve our effectiveness? [Can you tell that’s a Senser speaking??]

So let’s take a look at how we can leverage our knowledge about each of the styles to see how each style can communicate most successfully with the others.

INTUITORS

The Intuitor’s biggest challenge is communicating in concrete enough terms to meet the needs of the other styles.

To interact with a Thinker, try to be less abstract and offer some tangible facts and analysis to support your theory or argument.

To interact with a Senser, translate your concepts and theories so the Senser can see the practical application.

To interact with a Feeler, ask for her insights about how to get the other people in the department on board with your theories.

THINKERS

The Thinker’s biggest challenge is recognizing when more research and analysis is unnecessary and will just delay a decision.

To interact with an Intuitor, be willing to engage in some speculation and brainstorming without immediately applying constraints and limitations.

To interact with a Senser, show her how your facts and analysis are directly related to the end result or the decision at hand.

To interact with a Feeler, show a little enthusiasm and enlist her support in explaining the rationale behind the rules or regulations you’re responsible for.

SENSERS

The Senser’s biggest challenge is not discounting others’ points-of-view in her race to get things accomplished.

To interact with an Intuitor, be patient and allow the Intuitor to do some brainstorming or conceptualizing, recognizing that you can always guide the conversation to more practical ground.

To interact with a Thinker, back up your argument with facts and logic and don’t press the Thinker for an immediate decision.

To interact with a Feeler, take a few moments at the beginning of a conversation to establish rapport or ask the Feeler how she’s doing; this investment of time will pay off in increased cooperation and productivity.

FEELERS

The Feeler’s biggest challenge is being so concerned about other people’s feelings that she avoids difficult conversations.

To interact with an Intuitor, don’t overreact when she proposes an idea that you know will be unpopular with your colleagues.

To interact with a Thinker, frame your communication with facts rather than intuition or “gut feel.”

To interact with a Senser, get to the point and position any people concerns in terms of how they will impact the project deadline or bottom line.

OPPOSITE STYLES

Rather than viewing opposite styles as sources of conflict, view them as complementing each other and compensating for each other’s weaknesses.

An Intuitor is complemented by a Sensor:

• to ask practical questions
• to anticipate criticism
• to translate strategy into workable projects
• to get things done

A Thinker is complemented by a Feeler:

• to reconcile differences in a work group
• to anticipate how others will react
• to maintain good morale
• to generate enthusiasm

A Feeler is complemented by a Thinker:

• to maintain objectivity
• to ensure consistency
• to identify risks
• to criticize

A Senser is complemented by an Intuitor:

• to introduce alternatives
• to look at long term opportunities or consequences
• to assess complex problems
• to see connectedness, e.g., synergies, partnerships, product spin-offs

Remember – no style is good or bad. And each style is appropriate and effective in certain situations. The key is understanding and respecting each other’s differences. If we feel that others “get us”, we have the groundwork for good communication.

Armed with these insights about the four communication styles – and with a little bit of practice applying them – you now have the tools to dramatically improve your communications in the workplace and beyond.

COMMUNICATION STYLES - PART II

by Kathy Reiffenstein

"The problem with communication is
the illusion that it has been accomplished."
George Bernard Shaw, 20th century Irish playwright and Nobel laureate

Shaw's words are still true today. It's common practice to think that as long as we articulately convey some information or opinion, the listener will automatically understand it. Yet how many times do we shake our heads in frustration when that listener misunderstands our "clear" words?

The culprit is most likely different communication styles...different filters through which each of us sees the world, makes decisions and verbalizes our ideas. In the last post, we covered two of the four communication styles, based on psychoanalyst Carl Jung's work: the Intuitor and the Thinker. This post will cover the remaining two styles: the Senser and the Feeler.

THE SENSER

If you want something done, give it to a Senser. This style thrives on action, deadlines and results. Sensers have a high need to achieve but are very practical, so they only commit themselves to a project or an idea once they know how it will work and determine it has a good chance of succeeding. They are down-to-earth, energetic and very detail-oriented.

Although Sensers can conceptualize, they prefer dealing with specifics that can be quantified, like sales volume, quarterly profits and volume of calls versus more qualitative measures of performance. Sensers have high standards...they're frequently perfectionists...and impose these standards on others, sometimes leading others to think they are too demanding. Resourceful and well-organized, they like to make things happen. They are very direct in their communication, with little patience for people who can't get to the point and little time for small talk.

Because Sensers are so focused on achievement, they may emphasize short term results over long term planning. Always confident and assertive, this style may be criticized for being too opinionated and not caring about others' points-of-view.

Example:
The Senser is the person who, when listening to a presentation from a new salesperson giving some background on his company's history and product line, cuts the salesperson off by asking, "What's the cost of the product and what are your delivery time frames?"

Key Strength: Results focus and detail orientation, with a strong bias to action.
Key Weakness: Over-bearing with a tendency to ignore long term implications of actions.

THE FEELER

People who favour the Feeler style value relationships and harmony in their interactions with others. They are responsive to other peoples' needs, feelings and moods. They are quick to provide support, empathy and encouragement. A Feeler will typically be the person making sure that everyone else feels valued, gets their opinion heard and is happy. They are good at facilitating consensus and mediating disagreement.

Feelers focus on morale and facilitate teamwork, being the glue that holds the group together. They are great listeners and can often provide useful insights into organizational politics. A Feeler is friendly and approachable and is good at pointing out others' strengths. Because relationships are so important to a Feeler, goals and deadlines are sometimes sacrificed for the sake of the relationship. They tend to be more tactful than honest, not wanting to hurt anyone's feelings. In fact, they may tend to avoid or delay making decisions until everyone is happy with the decision.

Since Feelers rely more on "gut feelings" than logic, they may become defensive when confronted, appearing overly sensitive and subjective. This style can be criticized for being too emotional.

Example:
The Feeler is the person who spends time at the beginning of a meeting going around the table asking how everyone is doing, even though this takes up 20 minutes of the agenda, causing the meeting to start off behind schedule.

Key Strength: Empathy with others' feelings.
Key Weakness: Tendency to put harmony ahead of deadlines, goals or tough decisions.

Now that you have some insight into the four Communication Styles, you can see that each looks at the world through quite a different lens. Understanding these different perspectives can help you realize why communication is sometimes so challenging. And why sometimes it is only an illusion that it has been accomplished.

In the next post we'll look at how each of the four Communication Styles can interact most effectively with the others.

COMMUNICATION STYLES – PART I

by Kathy Reiffenstein

Communication is a critical skill for being effective and getting things done in both our business and personal lives. Yet it is a skill that we often take for granted. I mean…everyone knows how to talk, right? [especially we women!]

Do you ever wonder, though, why some conversations go so smoothly and some are so difficult? When communicating seems to be a struggle, perhaps you’ve thought it was because the other person was simply a poor communicator or you were just having a bad day. When communicating seems to go well, perhaps you’ve thought it was because the other person thinks just like you do. In fact, the real reason is different communication styles.

The theory of communication styles was developed from the work of Carl Jung, a 20th century Swiss psychoanalyst, who said that individuals develop different preferences for how they process information and make decisions; in turn, these preferences affect how people communicate with each other. From Jung’s work [which also formed the basis for the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator], four communication styles were identified: Intuitor, Thinker, Senser and Feeler.

In this post, we’ll cover the Intuitor and Thinker styles, looking at the characteristics of each style. In the next post, we’ll cover the Senser and Feeler styles and in the last post in this series, we’ll look at how the styles interact. As you read the descriptions, see if you can identify your own style or the styles of colleagues and family.

It’s important to note that none of these communication styles are inherently “good” or “bad.” Each style has unique strengths and potential weaknesses. The value comes in understanding your own style and the styles of others as a way to make your communication and interactions more productive.

THE INTUITOR

This is the big picture thinker, the person who is inspirational, visionary and conceptual. Intuitors value complex ideas, innovation and long-term thinking. They are happy dwelling in the world of theories and possibilities and gain more satisfaction from coming up with ideas and concepts than from actually implementing any of them. They are creative problem solvers and inspire others to think out of the box.

Intuitors communicate concepts, insights and fresh ideas but are often short on facts or how things will work in the real world. Because they focus on possibilities, they move quickly from topic to topic, often coming to conclusions without much explanation, assuming everyone else thinks the way they do and can follow.

Intuitors are not particularly action oriented, preferring to continue brainstorming. They are very convinced of the value of their ideas and contributions and may become irritated or defensive when others challenge their conclusions.

This style is frequently criticized for being unrealistic and impractical.

Example:
The Intuitor is the person who, in a meeting to finalize the details of the product launch for the new cell phone, starts brainstorming other alternatives to the already agreed upon phone colours and features.

Key Strength: Big picture, conceptual thinking.
Key Weakness: Reluctance to focus on practicalities, details and deadlines.

THE THINKER

This style values logic, objectivity and analysis. Thinkers are not easily influenced by emotions and, in fact, believe emotions really have no place in decision making. They find it valuable to analyze data or past actions as input to developing current solutions, relying on facts and reason versus intuition and emotion.

Thinkers are cool under pressure and tend to treat everyone fairly. They are concerned more with honesty and accuracy and less with tact and this frequently gets in the way of building and nurturing relationships, leading others to perceive them as blunt and insensitive.

Because they are so logical and factual, Thinkers assume everyone understands them and sees things the same way they do. They are often criticized for being too cautious and conservative, getting bogged down in analysis causing others to see them as indecisive.

Example:
The Thinker is the person who, when everyone in the meeting has agreed that it’s a good idea to close the office early on Friday as a thank you to hard-working employees, says she’ll get back to you tomorrow with her decision after she’s had time to think about it.

Key Strength: Logical, objective thinking based on facts.
Key Weakness: Tendency to get bogged down in analysis and delay decisions.

So the next time you’re having a conversation with your colleague and you’re frustrated because she doesn’t seem to understand your point, stop and think about communication styles. No doubt your Thinker is trying to communicate with her Intuitor [or vice-versa] and that’s what’s causing the difficulty.

The value of understanding your own communication style is greater awareness of what influences you to communicate in a certain way, new tools to help you communicate more effectively and better insight into how others perceive you.

The value of understanding others’ communication styles is flexibility in interactions and appreciation of the assumptions and motivations that affect how others communicate.

This combination of understanding and appreciating both yours and others’ styles can only lead to more productive, successful, meaningful dialogue.

In the next post, we’ll look at the remaining two styles, Senser and Feeler.

SPEAK PERSUASIVELY

by Kathy Reiffenstein

Standing in front of any audience, your goal is to persuade them

• that you know what you're talking about
• that your approach/suggestion/proposal is worth considering
• that they should do what you're asking them to do

Over two thousand years ago, the Greek philosopher, Aristotle, suggested that there are three available means of persuasion: ethos, logos and pathos. As valid today as they were then, these methods can make your presentations more compelling to your audience.

METHODS OF PERSUASION

Ethos, Greek for character, relies on the authority, credibility or expertise of the speaker to persuade. A medical doctor as the spokesperson in a TV commercial for a new cold remedy persuades through ethos.

In the business presentation, a subject matter expert exudes ethos. Would you be likely to believe Bill Gates’ view of the digital revolution or Sir Richard Branson’s forecast of what airplane travel will look like in fifty years? Probably. However, speakers sometimes rely too heavily on this persuasion technique. Don't let speaker credentials, title or rank substitute for crafting a truly persuasive argument. Ultimately it will be the audience who determines ethos.

Logos, Greek for word, uses logic, reason, statistics, polls and facts to persuade. It is harder to take the opposite point of view to an argument which uses logos because the data seems so well supported and incontrovertible. The marketing presentation using consumer research data to show the viability of introducing a new product is logos. The case for global warming uses logos persuasion by employing scientific evidence.

Pathos, Greek for experience or suffering, persuades by appealing to emotion and imagination. This is probably the least used approach in business presentations because we've been taught to be factual and concrete. But there is power in connecting with an audience through the heart. Pathos is using stories, vivid language and passionate delivery to make your message more personal and compelling, moving the audience to identify with your point of view.

USE MORE THAN ONE METHOD

The best presentations will incorporate more than one method of persuasion. Logos can enhance ethos by adding facts, substance and proof to the credentials. Pathos can enhance logos by taking dry statistics and making them more alive and relevant.

In analyzing your audience and the objectives of your presentation, incorporate these persuasion methods as a more powerful way to move your audience to embrace your message.

SELF PROMOTION WITH PROFESSIONALISM AND STYLE

by Kathy Reiffenstein

In business, letting others know about your skills, your ideas and your accomplishments is key to advancing your career. Yet, as women, we are frequently reluctant to do this, feeling it will make us sound too conceited or too aggressive.

Although it’s dangerous to generalize, studies have shown that men are better at self promotion than women. Men tend to be more focused on how to further their career goals while women are more concerned about relationships in the workplace and getting along with co-workers.

Unfortunately, expecting that others will notice what a great job you’re doing and reward you appropriately isn’t always a viable strategy. Being shy about communicating your strengths ultimately hurts you and your company, as both lose out on the larger contributions you could make.

So how do you self promote with professionalism and style?

IDENTIFY WHO TO BRAG TO

Everyone in your office or professional circle doesn’t need to know about all your skills and successes. Identify the people who can be instrumental in helping you achieve your goals – these are the people who definitely need to know what you’re capable of, what you’ve done successfully in the past, what you aspire to.

These influential people will likely include your boss, senior leaders in the organization, key clients and anyone who has a large network of contacts in these groups, and therefore some potential influence.

THINK FROM YOUR AUDIENCE’S PERSPECTIVE

When deciding what information to convey about yourself, think what would be helpful to the influential people you’ve identified. What do they need to know about you to help them assess how you may be able to make a bigger or different contribution? For example, attending professional lectures and conferences outside of work can demonstrate that you are dedicated to improving your skills. In turn, this could persuade your boss that you are the perfect candidate for the new management training program.

DEVELOP YOUR STORIES

Create some stories that clearly illustrate some of your strengths and accomplishments. Practice them so that when you tell them to others, they flow smoothly and cover the points you want to make. Being professional in your approach will make you more comfortable. When talking about what you can offer or your previous successes relate this to the current needs of your company, your department or your boss. That way it sounds less like bragging and more like offering help and making the relevant people aware of your talents.

SHOW, DON’T JUST TELL

It’s fine to tell people what you’re good at but it’s far more memorable to show them. Look for opportunities to prove how capable you are in specific areas by volunteering for projects or committees where you can demonstrate relevant skills.

Write articles for professional publications in your industry; search out speaking engagements which showcase your abilities; mentor others, either formally or informally, to illustrate your competency in certain areas.

MAKE OTHERS YOUR AMBASSADORS

Enlist others to endorse you. It’s always more powerful when someone other than you talks about how talented you are. But it’s important to control the message. Make sure that when others are talking about you, you have given them appropriate facts and examples so they can speak credibly and share the relevant information.


If you are one of the many talented women who have been reluctant to talk about the skills and accomplishments you have to offer, it’s time to shift your mindset. You owe it to both yourself and your company to ensure all the appropriate people know just how good you are. As three-time World Heavyweight Champion boxer Muhammad Ali said, “It’s not bragging if you can back it up.”

SOCIAL CAPITAL IS A POWERFUL PROFESSIONAL TOOL

by Kathy Reiffenstein

Capital is what keeps organizations healthy and thriving, allowing them to achieve their goals. But the capital I’m referring to here is not naira, pounds or dollars. It is the kind you find in relationships instead of in bank vaults. It is called social capital.

WHAT IS SOCIAL CAPITAL?

Social capital is a bit intangible. You can’t actually touch it or see it. It can be defined as the goodwill you earn with other people [and they with you], in both your professional and personal relationships, which motivates them to consider you more favourably and want to assist you.

Social capital is what makes your associate at work recommend you for that new project; it’s what makes the person in Accounting give you an extra few hours past the deadline to get your report in; it’s what makes your boss choose you to be part of the interdepartmental task force; it’s what makes your colleague at WIMBIZ tell you about the new job opening at her company. It’s the strength of the relationships you have with these people that cause them to advocate for you.

We have opportunities every day to acquire social capital through all of our interactions and activities in the workplace, as well as outside. The challenge is to make more deposits than withdrawals to our social capital account.

WHAT’S THE VALUE OF SOCIAL CAPITAL?

Your performance, your skills, your knowledge and your accomplishments are certainly important in establishing your reputation and validating your competence. But the strength of your social capital is what stands you apart.

Social capital can:

• increase productivity because you have the relationships that facilitate getting things done more effectively and efficiently
• give you access to useful and otherwise inaccessible information, like the unwritten details about what’s important to get that promotion
• increase your professional visibility and brand you as someone who is connected

HOW TO ACQUIRE SOCIAL CAPITAL

There are three basic steps to accumulating a wealth of social capital.

Build Relationships

Building quality relationships in your professional life is the foundation for acquiring social capital. The more people you know and who know you, the more contacts you have who can endorse you, both as a person and as a competent professional. A word of caution: the key is quality relationships. Be strategic in deciding where to invest your time to build a relationship.

Build Trust

As you are building a strong network of relationships, it is important to ensure that trust is a core aspect of those relationships. Earn peoples’ trust and confidence by keeping your commitments and acting with integrity in every interaction.

Practice the Law of Reciprocity

In every relationship and interaction, look for what you can give, not just for what you can get. Look for how you can help others, connect them, provide information. You will quickly gain the reputation as someone who adds value to a relationship.


Take a look at your professional relationships. How would you rate the amount of social capital you have? If it seems lacking, set yourself a goal of adding some deposits to your social capital account.

NERVOUS ABOUT A PRESENTATION?

by Kathy Reiffenstein

There is a famous quote that says: “There are two types of speakers – those that are nervous and those that are liars."

The panic about having to present or speak in public goes by many names: stage fright, jitters, performance anxiety, nerves. But whatever you call it, this feeling can range from mild anxiety, where you may experience a racing heart and sweaty palms, to downright dread, where flight seems the only viable course of action. If any of that sounds familiar to you, it may (or may not) be comforting to know that you're not alone.

WHERE DOES FEAR COME FROM?

When we are faced with something we perceive as stressful or dangerous, our brain responds by initiating a chain reaction which releases the chemicals that cause physical reactions like shortness of breath, sweaty palms and a stomach turning somersaults.

Unfortunately it doesn't matter whether the stressful stimulus is a car careening toward us or the questions we'll get asked in next week's presentation; our brain responds with the same fight or flight response. Anticipating a stressful event can produce the same reaction as actually experiencing it.

HOW CAN WE OVERCOME FEAR?

So how are we to turn a perceived "dangerous" situation, like giving a presentation, into something more positive? According to Stephen Maren, professor of psychology at the University of Michigan in the US, fear overrules reason every time because the fear circuitry in the brain is more powerful.

Counterintuitive though this sounds, Maren says the solution to overcoming fears is not avoiding them. Rather, repeated exposure to perceived fears in safe conditions helps us to realise that these threats are not real dangers. So that means get in front of people and present as often as you can. Don't hide away after the big conference or meeting, content to avoid any more presentations until next year.


IT'S A MIND GAME

In the fight or flight response, the brain is reacting instinctively to a perception, calling the autonomic nervous system into action. The brain, then, is precisely where we need to focus to reframe the perception. Here are some ways to help us recast those stressful perceptions of presenting in public to more neutral or even positive, images:

• Visualise. The subconscious doesn't differentiate between fantasy and reality, so create your own "story" about the stressful event. Visualise yourself feeling confident and competent, eager to share your information with your audience. Shifting your perception of the situation allows you to change behaviour. This technique, however, is not one that you can use once and expect miracles. You need to visualise several times a day, particularly in the week or so prior to your presentation, to solidify these images in your subconscious.

• Listen to soothing music (your definition of soothing) before your presentation to trigger your relaxation response.

• Clip a photo of loved ones or a favourite vacation spot to your notes or put it on the podium or table you are presenting from...this will help you stay grounded and remind you of something pleasant.

• Enlist friends to sit in the audience and then search out those familiar faces once you start to present. Share your anxiety with them ahead of time and they will be sure to offer you big smiles of encouragement every time you look at them.

• Mingle with people in your audience before the presentation and even chat with a few of them, if time permits. This will establish a human connection. It's less likely that you'll perceive the situation as stressful if you've just established a nice rapport with people who are going to listen to you.

The more you understand the physiological reasons for fearing or dreading a presentation, the easier it will be to stop blaming yourself for shortcomings and move forward with a productive plan of action. With a commitment to overcome your fear and a dedication to present as often as you can, you will be able to unmask your perceptions for what they are and create a new reality.

DO YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO BE AN ENTREPRENEUR?

by Kathy Reiffenstein

“Success to me is not about money or status or fame; it’s about finding a livelihood that brings me joy and self-sufficiency and a sense of contributing to the world.”

Anita Roddick, founder of The Body Shop

Thinking about making the jump into the world of the self-employed? Dreaming about being your own boss?

Before you give up your current job, before you even start planning what your new business will look like, there are some questions you should ask yourself.

WHY AM I STARTING MY BUSINESS?

If your main reason for starting a business is because you want to escape a job or boss you don’t like or you think owning a business is glamorous or you want to become rich quickly, perhaps you should reconsider.

Although starting a business may, indeed, accomplish these things, the person destined to become a successful entrepreneur starts a business because she is passionate about her product or service and sees a need for this product or service in the marketplace.

Without this passion, this strong belief in your vision, it will be very difficult to get through the many challenges that face every entrepreneur as she builds and grows her business.

CAN I BE HONEST IN MY ASSESSMENT?

Honesty and objectivity may seem to be the opposite of passionate belief, but a successful entrepreneur will clearly assess the obstacles and challenges to starting a new business. Passionate enthusiasm doesn’t have to be blind.

Beware of others’ unconditional encouragement, the “of course you can do it” attitude. While support is wonderful, be sure you have made a rational and objective assessment of both the challenges and opportunities of your business idea. Listen to the opinions of your critics – they may see issues that, in your enthusiasm and excitement, you have overlooked.

AM I COMFORTABLE WITH RISK?

There is not a new business venture in the world that doesn’t have some risk attached to it. Risk can range from the very practical to the more intangible:

• will customers buy my product or service?
• will my business make enough money to pay the bills?
• will I earn the respect of others in the business community?
• will my reputation survive if I fail?

A successful entrepreneur will certainly take steps to minimize the risks of starting a new business. But, bottom line, entrepreneurs can accept risk and even thrive on it.

So before you start your new business venture, ask yourself these three questions. Ask friends, colleagues and family too. Then listen honestly to all the answers.

[In a subsequent post, we will cover more tips on starting a business.]

DON'T YOU DARE APOLOGISE!

by Kathy Reiffenstein

Apologies certainly have their place in our lives...just not in our business presentations.

WHY DO PRESENTERS APOLOGISE?

We apologise because we're feeling inadequate, insecure, unprepared. We think that if we proactively point out all the things we feel aren't good enough about our presentation and delivery, then perhaps the audience won't judge us harshly.

Yet multiple apologies have the opposite effect: they annoy an audience and make them uncomfortable while severely compromising our credibility. When we apologise for not being prepared or for the small print on our slides that no one can read, we are doing two things: (1) drawing attention to aspects of our presentation that the audience might not otherwise notice and (2) sending the message that this audience isn’t important enough for us to do our best.

DON'T APOLOGISE FOR...

While you will definitely want to apologise for spilling hot coffee on someone or stepping on her toe, don't you dare apologise for these four things:

1. Misspeaking -- We all have the occasional slip of the tongue or we mispronounce a word. Either simply correct yourself (without apology!) or use a bridge such as "rather" to get to the correct word. [The final cost will be ten million...rather, ten billion naira.]

2. Clicking onto the Wrong Slide -- Simply acknowledge the slide was out of order and move to the correct one. [That slide was out of order…here’s the correct one.] Say something humorous if you’re comfortable with that. [The PowerPoint gremlins have been rearranging my slides again.]

3. Not Covering a Topic/Not Having Sufficient Material -- Bringing the audience's attention to something that's missing, through an apology, only highlights its absence and gives the missing piece undue importance. Either ignore it or factually and unapologetically explain why it's missing and direct the audience where they can obtain the information.

4. Not Knowing an Answer -- If after preparing your material thoroughly and anticipating what questions the audience will have, you still get asked a question you don’t know the answer to, you have nothing to apologise for. Admit you don't know the answer and either offer to get back to the questioner with the answer or direct him to where he can find it.

These recommendations are as relevant in business meetings as they are in business presentations.

Remember…the reasons that are causing you to apologise in the first place (nervousness, feeling inadequate) are known only to you, not to your audience. By not apologising, you’ll keep it that way!

Mentoring Training

Hello everyone,

Happy New Year. WIMBIZ wishes you the very best of 2010. Here's to inform you of our Mentoring Training scheduled for Saturday February 20, 2010.

Venue will be communicated to selected participants. Please visit our website for details.